


Five times Sonny didn't lose it and one time he does

by imaginentertain



Category: Days of Our Lives
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-11-17
Updated: 2013-11-17
Packaged: 2018-01-01 21:30:00
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,803
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1048780
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/imaginentertain/pseuds/imaginentertain
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Sonny is pretty good at holding it together. Most of the time.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Five times Sonny didn't lose it and one time he does

1) When Will isn't being honest with himself and that hurts

Sonny knows it takes time. He understands that all too well. He has lived it and he's talked to a number of guys about it and he's even seen a few people go through it themselves.

Will won't come to terms with who he is overnight. And Sonny knew this. He knew this the moment that nagging doubt in the back of his mind about his cousin's cousin turned into full on "gaydar" alert.

At first Will was a friend, someone Sonny would be there for when the time was right.

Then he was the cute guy that Sonny really, really shouldn't be thinking about in that way because Will is straight and with Gabi.

Then he was the single guy who was clearly struggling with something.

And all the time Sonny said nothing.

*

It's funny sometimes, how you don't notice things changing until one day you wake up and they're so different you wonder how you missed it. Like your hair or nails growing, time slipping past you, that kind of thing. Unless you stop and stare at it you blink, you turn away for just a moment, and when you look back everything's different.

From friendship to caring to outright love. To the point when he wanted to yell, shout, scream and do something (anything) to make this pain in his chest just go away. To see Will so hurt, so tormented...

One day Sonny had a friend he would have supported him through anything.

The next he was so in love he wanted to save him from everything.

*

The kiss with Neil should have been the start. At least that's what Sonny hoped. That first kiss, that first step? It should have been just what Will needed to accept himself, to start that even longer but better journey to honesty. Instead he ran, harder and faster, and that ache in Sonny's chest just got worse.

_"I know what you're going to say and it... never woulda happened... NEVER woulda happened if I'd... I just had too much to drink... Don't try to make this into something that it's not... You don't understand..."_

He understood. He'd been there. He'd tried to talk to Will but he'd walked away from him and there was that ache, there was that flare of pain through his chest and he stopped for a moment, resting his head on the stone plinth in the square. Biting his lip to stop himself from shouting it took a few deep breaths before he was able to get that pain under control.

It'll take what it takes. So he'll just... wait.

~~~

2) When Will moves out just as quickly as he moved in

Sonny slid the key into the lock but then he hesitated, just for a moment. Will had said that he'd moved his stuff out. A few hours ago the apartment had been filled with so much stuff and it really felt like... like _home_.

And now it wouldn't be.

He opened the door and walked into an apartment that he'd walked into a hundred, thousand times before. And it was the same apartment he'd walked into all those times. There was no sign that Will had ever been there.

At all.

He dropped his keys onto the side unit and shrugged off his jacket. He grabbed a bottle of water from the fridge and sat on the bed. And he tried, so hard, not to cry.

~~~

3) When Will signs away his rights

When Sonny was about five or six, he had a best friend just like every other little kid who's about five or six. And like every other set of childhood best friends they were inseparable. There wasn't a weekend or holiday that wasn't spent together exploring or adventuring or sailing the high seas in a backyard paddling pool.

Sonny and Augustus were the proverbial peas. Sonny was the only one who got to call him Gus, and Gus was the one who started the whole Sonny thing. (Gus' older brother was called Jack, it was easier for the five or six year old to make the distinction with a nickname.)

Their birthdays were two months apart but their moms quickly realised that things would be simpler if they did one joint party at the halfway point between Sonny's and Gus'. For one such birthday the two boys were given matching model aeroplane kits and they spent every waking moment building them. By the time Gus' birthday arrived a few weeks later the planes were assembled, painted and ready for their first flights.

Full of excitement the two boys raced to the nearest park, planes clutched in their hands and laughter ringing in the air. And for the next two hours they were having the times of their lives.

Until the bigger kids turned up and wanted the field for their game of soccer.

It would have been fine, they'd gone to get their planes and go, but that wasn't enough for one lad. In what was nothing more than an act of spite he grabbed Gus' plane and threw it to the ground, smashing it beyond repair.

Sonny had grabbed Gus' hand and taken him home where he'd cried in Jack's arms about the mean boys who'd ruined his plane and his birthday. Before Sonny had left he'd grabbed a piece of paper and written, in his best handwriting, HAPPY BIRTHDAY GUS. Then he'd left his plane on the table beside the note. Because that's who he was.

*

At some point during the night Will had started to cry. Saying nothing Sonny had just curled in tighter around him, holding on as tight as he could. There was nothing that he could say to make this better, nothing that would un-sign that document or stop the blackmail. And he wanted to shout and scream, he wanted to break down himself.

But he couldn't.

Because that's who he was.

~~~

4) When Will is shot

As soon as he hears those words, as soon as he's told? It's like everything stops for him. Time, the turning of the world, his own heartbeat. It stops right there and then and Sonny isn't sure that it'll ever start again.

His life is a simple existence of sitting by Will's bed, holding his hand, talking to him. Stretching his legs to grab food he doesn't want to eat, coffee so he can stay awake, and stolen moments of uncomfortable sleep in the chair. He stays by Will's side because nothing else is happening for him.

Sonny has the small hours of the morning to himself. EJ has forced Sami to go home and get some rest, Gabi is with Arianna. Sonny's own parents have retreated to a safe distance (later he will realise how he spoke to them and he will apologise profusely). The hospital is quiet but all Sonny can hear is the steady beep of the machines, a heartbeat that isn't his.

"She's beautiful," Sonny whispers in a voice that doesn't sound like his. "I mean... I know people say that all the time about their babies, but she's not mine and I'm telling you. She's beautiful. There's so much of you in her, I can tell. She's so aware of what's going on, just watching everything and everyone with those big eyes.

"Every now and then I'd catch you staring at the sonogram like it was the most precious thing in the world. And at the time I understood that, I really did. But trust me on this, when you finally see her? It'll be nothing like the sonogram. She's just down the hall, all you gotta do is wake up and we'll go down there right now. OK, Will?

"You have waited so long for this, you have been... so excited. And we have so many plans, you and me."

His voice failed. His fingers curled around Will's hand. He lifted it to his mouth. He pressed a simple kiss to it.

"So many plans, Will," Sonny whispered. He held Will's hand to his mouth again for a little bit longer and let his eyes drift shut.

He let nothing happen.

~~~

5) When Will might be slipping away from him

Sonny bolted from the room before anyone could stop him, his hands closing firmly around Nick's shirt as he pulled him across to the wall. Pushing hard Sonny revelled in the thud Nick's body made.

"More internal bleeding," Sonny growled. "They're talking about more surgery. Surgery they're not even sure his body can handle. His lung has only just re-inflated you son of a bitch, do you have any idea what anaesthesia can do to someone in that position? His mom is in there trying to work out if she's about to consent to his death or not."

"I never—"

"No, you don't get to say anything here, you don't get to say a _damn word_ do you hear me? He is in there right now, because of you. He could die because of you. His little girl is never going to get to see her daddy and all because you are so screwed up that you think because he's gay he's the bad guy? Last time I checked he wasn't the one getting you and a heavily pregnant woman tied up and held at gunpoint.

"All Will has ever wanted was to be a father to his kid. That was it. Be a dad. And you tried again and again to take that away from him. Well guess what, Nick? Looks like you've just about done it. Congratulations. No more gay daddy. He could be out of the way permanently and you get to have your happy little family. Assuming Gabi lets you near her and Arianna after what's happened of course.

"But I swear to you, Nick, if Will dies, if he does not come out of this one hundred percent OK? I. Will. End. You. I will make it my mission to see you suffer for the rest of your life and I will ensure that you don't get to say two words to Arianna. Every second of every day? I will be there and you will reap tenfold for every moment of hurt and pain that you caused.

"You claim to love Gabi so much that you would do anything for her? Well guess what? I feel _exactly_ the same way about Will. I love him, you hear me? I love him and there is nothing I won't do for him. You lied, you blackmailed, you manipulated everyone around you to get what you wanted from Nick but that? That's child's play for me. And especially for EJ.

"Do you understand what that means? A Kiriakis and a DiMera, working together for one aim. To take you down. You won't stand a chance so if I were you I'd do two things. Firstly, I'd get the hell out of here and I'd stop walking around like you have the right to be hanging around Will's bedside, like it's not your fault that they're all here.

"And secondly, I'd pray, _real hard_ , that Will comes through this surgery OK because if there is one bit of him that is not the guy that I love more than anything else in this world? I will not be happy."

And with that he let go, allowing Nick to scuttle away. Then he turned back to those waiting for him.

"Feel better?" EJ said.

"Ask me again when Will is out of surgery," he replied. "Was I wrong?" he asked.

"Not a single word," EJ affirmed.

Sonny clenched his jaw, taking in a series of deep breaths to make sure that he could get his emotions under control. Not now.

~~~

+1) When Will is right there with him

"This is stupid," Sonny muttered as he dropped their bags onto the bed.

"I think it's sweet," Will replied. "Your mom just wants to make sure that I'm OK. That you're OK." He sat on the edge of the bed and looked around the room. "Is this weird for you? Coming back here with me?"

"What?"

"You seem... tense. You've barely said two words since we left the hospital."

"I'm fine," Sonny replied.

"Sure. You've barely slept in weeks and don't think I've not noticed that you've lost weight so I have no idea when you last ate. You've been half a step away from me since I woke up, which I can understand, but it also means that I've been half a step away from you and I know you, Sonny. Something is not right."

"It's just... been a long few weeks, OK? I'll be fine." Sonny gave a small laugh. "Once I get out of my parents' house that is. I am more than capable of looking after myself, and you for that matter."

"I know," Will said. "But on the other hand, us staying here for a few days means that I get to be close to AG. And I need that right now. After what happened I just... I want to be here for her. And after what happened your mom gets to keep you close. I can understand that."

"Two nights, OK? Just two nights and then we are going home."

"No promises," Will said.

"Two nights and you'll want to go home," Sonny replied, "I mean Mom's great but... small doses."

"I can imagine," Will laughed, and then he hissed, his hand flying to his chest.

"Sorry," Sonny said, immediately moving and crouching in front of Will. "Guess I'll have to keep my legendary sense of humour under wraps for a bit."

"That would be appreciated, thank you," Will said, leaning over carefully and kissing Sonny gently. "You coming down?"

"In a minute."

"OK. Make it a quick minute though?" he asked. Sonny nodded before he helped Will to his feet before kissing him gently. Halfway down the corridor Will realised that he was supposed to take his painkillers with food, so he turned back and opened the door. "Hey, I forgot—"

Sonny jumped up from the bed as if he'd been caught doing something he shouldn't be. Quickly he wiped his eyes and opened his mouth to say something but nothing came out.

"Sonny..." Will breathed. He crossed the room to his boyfriend and pulled him into his arms. "It's OK."

"No, it's not," Sonny said into Will's shoulder, holding on just as tightly as he was being held. "I nearly lost you, Will. I could have—"

"You didn't, you won't, I'm here." He could feel Sonny's body shaking with quiet sobs and so he held on tighter, one hand running up into his hair. "I'm right here."

"I'm sorry," Sonny cried, "I just... I've tried..."

"Tried what?"

"Everything was going wrong and they needed me to be strong and I tried—"

"You don't need to be strong," Will cut across. "You don't need to be strong for me or for anyone."

"You were so ill and we were so worried and I just... I couldn't lose it."

"It's over now," Will said, "it's OK. And don't... don't feel like you have to be strong for me."

"But—"

"No," Will said firmly. He pulled back and held Sonny's face in his hands before kissing him. "I don't need you to always be the strong one. I need you to... just be here. Be with me. Talk to me and just... love me, OK?"

"OK," Sonny whispered.

Will's thumbs brushed over the tear tracks on Sonny's face before he pulled him in for another kiss. "I'm right here and I'm not going anywhere. You and me, we have too many plans."

"Lots of them," Sonny laughed.

"As long as you'll have me I'm sticking around."

"So that would be... for the rest of our lives?"

"I'm OK with that," Will smiled. "I'm really OK with that."

"Don't you dare do that to me again," Sonny said. "I am not going through that again in this lifetime."

"I will try to minimise all shootings in the future."

"No jokes," Sonny reminded him, his hand moving unconsciously to Will's chest and the bandage that was under his shirt. "Remember?"

"OK. No jokes."

"Lunch?"

"Yeah, I just need to grab..." Will said, nodding in the direction of the unit on which the small bottle sat. "With food. Which I am certain I'm going to keep forgetting."

"Then I'll remind you," Sonny said, reaching out to grab the bottle. "Whatever you need."

"And what do you need?"

"You," Sonny replied immediately. "Just you." A small cry crossed the hallway and they both gave a small laugh. "OK, and her. The three of us."

"Come on," Will said, "you good to go?"

"Always."

_~fin~_  



End file.
